The Sydney Mardi Gras
Can you guess where half a million partiers head to in February? 500,000 people from around the globe fly to Sydney to get an unforgettable experience at the Sydney Mardi Gras. The festival has been held since 1978 by a non-profit organization called Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras. It aims to promote acceptance and rights of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer and intersex (LGBTQI) community through the Sydney Mardi Gras. This global festival lasts for three weeks throughout February and March every year. Of more than 70 events the Sydney Mardi Gras consists of, Fair Day, the Sydney Mardi Gras Parade, and the Sydney Mardi Gras Party are major highlights that draw international attention.
Fair Day is the official kick-off of the Sydney Mardi Gras which attracts over 70,000 people to Victoria Park. It is a community celebration that offers a perfect opportunity for families, friends, and even pets to engage in a friendly picnic under the beautiful sunlight. Everyone sits on the grass and spend a lovely time catching up with friends and relatives. Organizations related to health services and community groups that support Sydney's LGBTQI community also participate in Fair Day. On the day, the park is filled with stalls and bars that sell delicacies, drinks, and items. The fair features live entertainment and fun events for children, adults, and dogs with the highlight being Mr. and Ms. Fair Day competition.
Following Fair Day, a number of fabulous shows take place and blow people's minds away. However, nothing can compare to the Sydney Mardi Gras Parade which symbolizes the festival. As a tradition, the parade commences when the lesbian motorcycle club called Dykes on Bikes start their engines on Oxford Street. The world-famous parade features almost 10,000 individuals and community groups dressed in colorful costumes that represent diversity. As the troops march along the streets with endless music and fireworks, hundreds and thousands of spectators cheer, sing, dance, and enjoy the globally renowned parade.
Right after the parade, the Sydney Mardi Gras Party awaits all of us. This is one of the largest parties in the country where the excitement reaches its peak. More than 15,000 party-goers purchase tickets for the after party to sing and dance with international DJs, artists, and entertainers. The grand scale of this party is highlighted by the fact that it is held across multiple venues with each space providing different types of music to suit everyone's taste. On top of that, the party does not end until dawn so there is plenty of time for everyone to spend the best night of their lives at the Sydney Mardi Gras Party.
When it comes to festivals, people expect great spectacles and fun. The Sydney Mardi Gras not only offers both but inspire hope for LGBQTI community. Its long-standing values and spirit that seek to achieve equality of such community surely deserve worldwide respect. Therefore, there is no doubt that the Sydney Mardi Gras is a festival worth visiting for everyone.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteFrom Naeun Kang to Jae Hyun Park
ReplyDelete1. Does the essay have a thesis statement that identifies the process? If so, underline the thesis statement.
: Of more than 70 events the Sydney Mardi Gras consists of, Fair Day, the Sydney Mardi Gras Parade, and the Sydney Mardi Gras Party are major highlights that draw international attention
2. Does the writer include background information? If so, summarize the information here.
: The festival, Mardi Gras, has been held since 1978 and it is for the rights of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender.
3. Does each paragraph present a different part of the process?
Yes it does. It divides into 3 processes.
4. Are the parts of the process organized in a logical sequence? List the sequence here.
Yes they are. They are organized by chronological sequence. The festival is held by following sequence; Fair Day, Sydney Mardi Gras Parade, and the Sydney Mardi Gras Party.
5. Do the body Paragraphs have any facts, definitions, or details? Tell the writer if any of these supporting details aren’t sufficient.
It seems that details are sufficient. However, I wonder that if the purpose of this festival is to promote acceptance and rights of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender as you said, is there special one for them on the Fair day or the Party except the parade? If there were more details about events for them, it is easy to understand the purpose of the festival.
6. Does the writer include an evaluation, recommendation, or warning in the conclusion?
Yes it has evaluation and recommendation. Writer says that the festival offers not only spectacles and fun but also hope, so it worth visiting.
Jae Hyun Park/second draft/tues11am
ReplyDeleteThe Sydney Mardi Gras
Can you guess where half a million partiers head to in February? 500,000 people from around the globe fly to Sydney to get an unforgettable experience at the Sydney Mardi Gras. The festival has been held since 1978 by a non-profit organization called Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras. It aims to promote acceptance and rights of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer and intersex (LGBTQI) community through the Sydney Mardi Gras. This global festival lasts for three weeks throughout February and March every year. Of more than 70 events the Sydney Mardi Gras consists of, Fair Day, the Sydney Mardi Gras Parade, and the Sydney Mardi Gras Party are major highlights that draw international attention.
Fair Day is the official kick-off of the Sydney Mardi Gras which attracts over 70,000 people to Victoria Park. It is a community celebration that offers a perfect opportunity for families, friends, and even pets to engage in a friendly picnic under the beautiful sunlight. Everyone sits on the grass and spend a lovely time catching up with friends and relatives. On the day, the park is filled with stalls and bars that sell delicacies, drinks, and items organized by hundreds of volunteers from the LGBTQI community. Organizations related to health services and various community groups that support Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras also get together for Fair Day. They assist in planning and running activities for the fair such as live entertainment and fun events for children, adults, and dogs with the highlight being Mr. and Ms. Fair Day competition.
Following Fair Day, a number of fabulous shows take place and blow people’s minds away. However, nothing can compare to the Sydney Mardi Gras Parade which symbolizes the festival. As a tradition, the parade commences when the lesbian motorcycle club called Dykes on Bikes start their engines on Oxford Street. The world-famous parade features almost 10,000 individuals and community groups dressed in colorful and unique costumes. Such fancy and outlandish clothes stand as a statement of pride for the LGBTQI community and simultaneously represent diversity and acceptance. Many well-known stars join and show their support just as the famous Korean celebrity Seok Cheon Hong did a few years ago. As the troops march along the streets with endless music and fireworks, hundreds and thousands of spectators cheer, sing, dance, and enjoy the globally renowned parade.
Right after the parade, the Sydney Mardi Gras Party awaits all of us. This is one of the largest parties in the country where the excitement reaches its peak. More than 15,000 party-goers purchase tickets for the after party to sing and dance with international DJs and artists. A variety of performances by LGBTQI entertainers brighten up the stage and the presence of popular celebrities who are part of the LGBTQI community further adorns the celebration. The grand scale of this party is highlighted by the fact that it is held across multiple venues with each space providing different types of music to suit everyone’s taste. On top of that, the party does not end until dawn so there is plenty of time for everyone to spend the best night of their lives at the Sydney Mardi Gras Party.
ReplyDeleteWhen it comes to festivals, people expect great spectacles and fun. The Sydney Mardi Gras not only offers both but inspire hope for the LGBQTI community. Its long-standing values and spirit that seek to achieve equality of such community surely deserve worldwide respect. Therefore, there is no doubt that the Sydney Mardi Gras is a festival worth visiting for everyone.