Stevie woder'ful'
Who do you like the most among world-famous musicians around the world? What makes you love them? I myself am really into many kinds of music, including R&B, Ballads, Rock, Jazz and so on. Although I am interested in various kinds of music, I personally think Stevie Wonder is one of the best musicians of all time; Not only has he affected music field greatly, but also he has led the solutions to many world problems such as AIDS and racial discrimination. Then, what made him become a one of the most outstanding musicians in the world and what did he have an effect on the world with or without his music?
He was born in Saginaw, Michigan, in 1950 with a name of Stevland Hardaway Morris. The name now he is called, Stevie Wonder, is his stage name. When he was born, six weeks premature, he had to stay in the hospital incubator. There was too much oxygen inside of the incubator, which resulted in retinopathy of prematurity. It is a condition where the growth of the eyes is aborted and causes the retinas detach. As a result, he has been a blind since shortly after birth. This living legendary started to hear the world instead of seeing it; consequently, he has heard people suffering from disease, poverty, and so on, which made him start helping others.
This world famous pop star, could understand people in difficult situations more than ordinary people because he himself is a blind. With his output from the activities as a sing a song writer and singer, he has helped people suffering from AIDS, racial discrimination and disabilities and also tried to eliminate the problems from drugs and homelessness. These kinds of his activities led him to get named a UN Messenger of Peace. He inspired people around the world that even race, poverty, and disability which were the problems he once had lived with could not be challenges to become a world famous starts and be rich enough to other people.
He also inspired the world with his music. He released his first album when 11, which surprised the world and made him be called as Little Stevie 'Wonder'. With his musical talent, especially his outstanding rhythmical and melodic talent, he has won 22 Grammy Award, as well as other awards including Grammy Lifetime Achievement Award. The world famous music magazine, Rolling Stone, said this genius musician's albums "pioneered stylistic approaches that helped to determine the shape of pop music for the next decade." He is now a literally a living legend in music field, and it is result of being given wizardly musical talent in turns for being a blind.
Stevie Wonder inspired all around the world with his life as well as with his music. He has overcome his given situations and has had a great effect on the world. People in a difficult situations might get a strength to overcome them from his life, and world listen to his music working miracles. Musicians say with their music, but a person say with his behaviour. He has done two of both greatly. People cannot do even one of it in their whole life. Could not these be the enough reasons that I take him as a one of the best musicians of all time?
To Daewon Shin from Xeniya Pak
ReplyDeleteHello! I really enjoyed your essay, particularly I didn’t know that much how important and valuable is Steve Wonder.
1. I think it would be better if you provide effects that he has in your thesis statement. Because it is not clear what exactly will be discussed in your essay.
2. Yes. Your each body paragraphs contain topic sentences which show causes. In the first and second paragraphs you described his early life and his disease which made him stronger and pushed him to help other people. And in the third, you described his achievements in music which inspired a lot of people.
3. Yes.
4. Yes. You used effect connectors such as “as a result, consequently” which helped you to explain your causes in a logical way.
5. I think partially yes, however you restate only his achievement in music field not his charity works.
6. I believe it is evaluation. He has overcome his given situations and has had a great effect on the world. People in a difficult situations might get a strength to overcome them from his life, and world listen to his music working miracles.
2nd draft - Daewon Shin
ReplyDeleteWho do you like the most among world-famous musicians around the world? What makes you love them? I myself am really into many kinds of music, including R&B, Ballads, Rock, Jazz and so on. Although I am interested in various kinds of music, I personally think Stevie Wonder is one of the best musicians of all time; Not only has he affected music field greatly, but also he has led the solutions to many worldwide problems such as AIDS and racial discrimination. Then, what made him become one of the most outstanding musicians in the world and what did he have an effect on the world with or without his music?
He was born in Saginaw, Michigan, in 1950 with a name of Stevland Hardaway Morris. The name now he is called, Stevie Wonder, is his stage name. When he was born, six weeks premature, he had to stay in the hospital incubator. There was too much oxygen inside of the incubator, which resulted in retinopathy of prematurity. It is a condition where the growth of the eyes is aborted and causes the retinas detach. As a result, he has been a blind since shortly after birth. This living legendary started to hear the world instead of seeing it; consequently, he has heard people suffering from disease, poverty, and so on, which made him start helping others.
This world famous pop star, could understand people in difficult situations more than any others could because he himself is a blind. With his output from the activities as a sing a song writer, he has helped people suffering from AIDS, racial discrimination and disabilities and also tried to eliminate the problems from drugs and homelessness. These kinds of his activities led him to get named a UN Messenger of Peace. He inspired people around the world that even race, poverty, and disability, which were the problems he once had lived with, could not be challenges to become a world famous starts and be rich enough to help others.
He also inspired the world with his music. He released his first album when 11, which surprised the world and made him be called as Little Stevie ‘Wonder’. With his musical talent, especially his outstanding rhythmical and melodic talent, he has won 22 Grammy Award, as well as other awards including Grammy Lifetime Achievement Award. The world famous music magazine, Rolling Stone, said this genius musician’s albums “pioneered stylistic approaches that helped to determine the shape of pop music for the next decade.” He is now a literally a living legend in music field, and it is the result of being given wizardly musical talent in turns for being a blind.
Stevie Wonder inspired all around the world with his life as well as with his music. He has overcome his given situations, which has had a great effect on the world. People in a difficult situations might get a strength to overcome their problems from his life, and world listen to his music working miracles. Musicians say with their music, but a person say with his behaviour. He has done two of both greatly. People cannot do even one of it in their whole life. These could be the enough reasons that I take him as a one of the best musicians of all time.
Final Draft - Daewon Shin
ReplyDeleteWho do you like the most among world-famous musicians around the world? What makes you love them? I myself am really into many kinds of music, including R&B, Ballads, Rock, Jazz and so on. Although I am interested in various kinds of music, I personally think Stevie Wonder is one of the best musicians of all time; Not only has he affected music field greatly, but also he has led the solutions to many worldwide problems such as AIDS and racial discrimination. Then, what made him become one of the most outstanding musicians in the world and what did he have an effect on the world with or without his music?
He was born in Saginaw, Michigan, in 1950 with a name of Stevland Hardaway Morris.
The name now he is called, Stevie Wonder, is his stage name. When he was born, six weeks premature, he had to stay in the hospital incubator. There was too much oxygen inside of the incubator, and it resulted in retinopathy of prematurity, which is a condition where the growth of the eyes is aborted and causes the retinas detach. As a result, he has been a blind since shortly after birth. This living legendary started to hear the world instead of seeing it; consequently, he has heard people suffering from disease, poverty, and other problems, which made him start helping others.
This world famous pop star, understands people in difficult situations more than any others do because he himself is a blind. With his output from the activities as a sing a song writer, he has helped people suffering from AIDS, racial discrimination and disabilities and also tried to eliminate the problems from drugs and homelessness. These kinds of his activities led him to get named a UN Messenger of Peace. He inspired people around the world that even race, poverty, and disability, which were the problems he once had lived with, were not challenges to become a world famous starts and be rich enough to help others.
He also inspired the world with his music. He released his first album when 11. This album surprised the world and made him be called as Little Stevie ‘Wonder’. With his musical talent,
especially his outstanding rhythmical and melodic talent, he has won 22 Grammy Award, as well as other awards including Grammy Lifetime Achievement Award. The world famous music magazine, Rolling Stone, said this genius musician’s albums “pioneered stylistic approaches that helped to determine the shape of pop music for the next decade.” He is now a literally a living legend in music field, and it is the result of being given wizardly musical talent in turns for being a blind.
Stevie Wonder inspired all around the world with his life as well as with his music. He has overcome his given situations, which has had a great effect on the world. People in a difficult situations might get a strength to overcome their problems from his life, and world listen to his music working miracles. Musicians say with their music, but a person say with his behaviour. He has done two of both greatly. People cannot do even one of them in their whole life. These could be the enough reasons that I take him as a one of the best musicians of all time.